Desperate Joy

  Many times, we believe that our struggles with habitual sin and addictions are a power struggle of some sort. We think we must be strong and have willpower, if we only had more self-control then we would be able to overcome. We discussed this in a previous post. The reality is that our conflicts are not a power struggle but a truth struggle. Addiction is about truth versus lies not strength versus strength. One of the most powerful truths I have found in my recovery journey is understanding the nature of my identity in Christ. The more I understand my position of power and authority in Christ, the more I can resist the temptations of the addiction. The more I have realized who I am in Christ, the more I have been able to combat the lies that contribute to my automatic thoughts and false beliefs. When the Devil attacks, one of the most common pressure points he targets is our identity. He convinces us that we are worthless and inadequate. He tells us that we are sinners, addic...

God's design and plan is always good.  Our bodies are inherently good and valuable because we are created in the image of God, and we are the Temples of the Holy Spirit.  Our bodies are sacred objects worthy of dignity and respect.  We have been developing these ideas over the last couple of weeks, but there is more to the story. Adam, Eve, and all of creation was called "very good" (Genesis 1:32) but then Adam and Eve sinned and all of that was shattered, destroyed their selfish choices.   As much as we need to realize that our bodies are created in the image of God and are meant to be the temple of the Holy Ghost, these images are marred, and these temples are damaged.   No one is the perfect image of God, or the ideal temple. The sad reality is that we live in a post-Genesis 3 world - a world broken by sin.   Our bodies, brains, minds, and spirits have all been stained by its ugly curse.   The Chemistry in our brains is out of balance, our neuro...

  Over the previous few posts, we have been looking at this idea of personas, masks that we wear, or fig leaf disguises we put on to hide our shame from ourselves, God and those around us.  Last time we looked at the life of Saul of Tarsus who was converted and became the Apostle Paul.  When he was confronted by God on the Damascus road, his masks shattered, and God rebuilt him and made him into a new man, a better man.  A man that could be used for his service.  Through that process Paul stepped out of his persona as a self-righteous hypocrite into his true identity as a child of God, or as he often wrote in his letters, the servant of Jesus Christ.  Saul of Tarsus had to be crushed to dust before God could build up Paul the Apostle. There are echoes here of my own story.   I grew up in a solid, Christian home, with loving, nurturing parents, but in spite of all that I was wounded, and my soul was ruptured.   This led to me feeling inadequate...

  In the previous post we looked at the idea that we have damaged hearts and souls, and like Adam and Eve in the Garden we try to cover that damage with fig leaves, masks, and personas.   We put on disguises, like being perfectionists, workaholics, addicts, the clown, or the over-achiever to hide our authentic selves from God and those around us.   The Bible has many examples of people who had these personas built up around their true selves due to their own hard heartedness and Satan's deceptions.   One such dramatic example is Saul of Tarsus. Saul hated Christians.   He despised them, he believed they were an insult and an assault on the true worship of Jehovah and the Temple Worship of Judaism.   Saul was a strict rule keeper and was fastidious in his adherence to the Mosaic law.   When the Apostles started preaching about salvation through faith in Christ, and the grace of God being available to all, he couldn't stand for this.   His zeal fo...

  The Bible is truly the most amazing book on the planet.  One of the reasons the stories in the Bible have been so resilient throughout the ages is because they contain themes and ideas that touch on timeless truths that all of us feel and experience.  Nowhere in the Bible is this more apparent than in the first few chapters of Genesis. When Adam and Eve fell into sin, eating the forbidden fruit, something tragic, but interesting, happens.   They felt shame for the first time.   Genesis 3:7 says, "And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves aprons."   For the first time they knew that they were naked.   A few verses back we read that they were naked and unashamed (2:25), now they were naked and ashamed.   Their eyes were opened, and they knew.   They knew something had gone wrong, that they had done something wrong.   Their innocence was lost. Crit...

  I have a dedicated, faithful friend named Tom. He is actually the person who updates this blog for me :).  We met a few years back at a Twelve Step meeting for sex addiction.  Tom began calling me on a regular basis, even when I had to move out of state to live with my dad while I was on pre-trial release and could not go to meetings with him.  He was persistent, and I am grateful for that.  At many times I struggled with relapses and depression, and even when I would ignore his calls for days or weeks, he continued to call.  He has helped me through many, many dark times and I am deeply grateful to him for that. When I first started talking to Tom, he was living a homosexual lifestyle, but was on his way out of it in most ways.   He acknowledged that many of his behaviors were unhealthy and addictive.   One of the reasons we connected is because of our shared faith.   An important part of the Twelve Steps is learning to connect with God,...

  In the last two posts we saw how marriage and birth both reiterate and recapitulate the Gospel.  Every time a child is born and a couple is wed, the Gospel is preached. The reason we feel such gladness around these events is because they are images of deep spiritual truths that God wants us to know and understand.  These events give us a glimpse of our eternal home.  We are wired to feel joy at a wedding and when a baby is delivered because we have been wired for eternity. Our sexuality is an essential aspect of marriage and child bearing, and our sexuality is by definition rooted in our bodies as male and female.  This means that the wondrous story of everlasting life and redemption is told in part through our bodies, both as males and females, through our masculinity and our femininity.  The male body has its part to play in telling God's eternal story, and the female body has its part to play as well.  Both are essential.  Both are good and b...