Truth and Freedom

 

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For a big chunk of my twenties, I believed that if my willpower were strong enough, I could break free from my addiction to porn. I thought if I were focused and determined enough then I could stop acting out. If I could summon the strength of will then I could wrestle that bear of addiction into submission.

I believed that overcoming those mental and spiritual strongholds was a matter of power. The conflict was a simple matter of two forces meeting and the greater won. It was like sumo wrestlers colliding in the middle of the ring, if I were strong enough, I could force the addiction out of my life.

This is not the reality that God has revealed in his Word. The apostle Paul reveals a far different perspective in Ephesians, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world against spiritual wickedness in high places."

Our battle with sin and addiction is primarily a spiritual one. Flesh and blood do not apply. Power of mind, or strength of will matter little. More often than not, these attitudes work against us. The devil is perfectly happy when we fight in our own strength and operate in pride and arrogance. He is pleased when we believe we can handle it by ourselves. 

Often addiction is like quicksand, the more we thrash around, fighting in our own will and strength, the more quickly we sink. But if we lay down and surrender, God can step in and deliver us, and we can find some peace and stability.

The Bible says this in 2 Corinthians 10:5, "Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience to Christ."

The battle is primarily with thoughts and imagination. The word "imaginations" means concepts and ideas. These are the images and words, the ideas and beliefs that run through our mind. Satan will infiltrate the scaffolding of our mind, and fill it with his deceptions. We must cast down those deceptions and take captive those lies.

The fortress of addiction is built with the stones of lies. Brick by brick, day by day and year by year Satan sets these stones and builds these strongholds in our hearts. If we are going to know spiritual liberty, we must come to recognize these lies and combat them with the truth.

We would not use a spatula to hammer a nail. We would not use a hammer to turn a pancake. We cannot fight a lie with willpower. We cannot overcome deceit by determination.

Truth is our primary weapon in our battle with addiction. We identify those false ideas and beliefs and then attack them with the truth.

Jesus said this, "Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free."(John 8:32)

In the previous post we discussed that love is essential to overcoming addiction. We certainly cannot find sobriety and serenity without love, but as much as we need love, we need truth. Love cannot be genuine unless it is based on the truth.

Love and truth function like the two wings of a bird, they must both be flapping if we are going to get off the ground. One without the other will only leave us spinning in circles, spiraling deeper into our addiction.

To properly combat the lies of the addiction, we must be able to identify them. The truth is like medicine; to be most effective, it should target a specific disease, or symptom, a particular lie or false belief.

One of the leading researchers and treatment specialists for sex addiction, Patrick Carnes, has identified four root lies that all sex addicts believe (these fit any addiction, just swap "sex" for your drug of choice) (Patrick Carnes, *Facing the Shadow: Starting Sexual and Relationship Recovery*, Gentle Path Press, 2015. p. 46; He also explains this in his book on sex addiction, *Out of the Shadows*):

"I am basically a bad, unworthy person."

"No one would love me as I am."

"I am on my own to meet my needs."

"Sex is my greatest need."

We have written quite a bit about toxic shame, and you will notice the voice of toxic shame in these lies.

If you are an addict, or just struggle with any bad habit, you have more than likely heard and believed some version of these lies. Sex might not be your issue, it might be alcohol, or food, or shopping, or relationships.

We may also recognize other lies that afflict us, there are certainly many, many others that Satan will feed us throughout our lives. If we can identify others, we can write those down. We want to identify the problem as carefully as possible and then prepare to counteract them with the truth.

Let's take these four big lies and then target them with the truth. We can take a verse of Scripture and then write an affirmation to fit the truth. These become our ammunition in our fight with addiction.

Here is the first lie:  "I am basically a bad, unworthy person."

Scripture:  Psalm 139:14 "I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well." (This one actually works really well on its own as an affirmation.)

Affirmation: "I am fearfully and wonderfully made, fashioned as a living icon of the wisest, bravest and most beautiful person who ever lived."

There are many other Scriptures that can be helpful here: 2 Corinthians 5:17, Ephesians 1:3-14; Colossians 2:6-15; 2 Peter 1:3-4

Second lie:  "No one would love me as I am."

Scripture: Romans 5:8 “But God commendeth his love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."

Affirmation: "Even though I am a wretched sinner, Jesus Christ loved me so much that he died on the Cross to save me."

More Scripture: 2 Samuel 14:14; Psalm 40:1-3; Jeremiah 31:3; Zephaniah 3:17; 2 Corinthians 5:21, 8:9; Ephesians 2:4-10; 1 John 3:1-3

Lie number three: "I am on my own to meet my needs."

Scripture: Philippians 4:19 "But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus."

Affirmation:  "Christ is all I want and all I need, and I am fully satisfied in him."

More Scripture: Psalm 34:18, 37:23-24, 103:1-3; Matthew 7:7-8, 11:28-30; Luke 10:19-20; Ephesians 1:3-14; 1 John 4:4; Jude 1:24-25

And finally, lie number four: "Sex is my greatest need."

Scripture:  Micah 6:8 "He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?"

Affirmation:  "Sex is not my greatest need, my greatest need is to walk with God."

More Scripture: Psalm 103:1-3; Matthew 4:4; John 4:13-14, 6:47-51; Romans 6, Colossians 2:6-15; Galatians 2:20; Galatians 5:1

Each of us will struggle with our own unique set of lies, though these four will certainly be in the mix to some degree. Every time we act out in our addictions we can usually identify the lies that are at work that led us into it.  Then we can find Scripture to oppose those lies, write affirmations, and meditate on those Scriptures and affirmations.

My practice has been to use a journal to collect those verses and affirmations and I will often lay in bed (or sit at a desk), and meditate on those Scriptures and affirmations. The affirmations, especially, I will repeat over and over in my head while I recline. These practices have helped to break down the strongholds of lies around the addiction and move my heart and mind into a more sound and serene state.

God's Word is powerful in its ability reprogram our hearts and minds and put us on the path of holiness and righteousness.

This does not mean that Scripture is a silver bullet of some sort, and we will memorize the right verse and suddenly become free. We must meditate on the truth daily and allow it to sink into our hearts and minds and transform us gradually, one day at a time.

We can never become strong enough to overcome our addictions. We can't muster the willpower necessary to overcome strongholds of sin in our lives. We must come to know and believe the truth and allow the truth to set us free.

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